Matthew 5:21–25
21 “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ 22 But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire. 23 So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. 25 Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are going with him to court, lest your accuser hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the guard, and you be put in prison.
The Christian faith is based on our relationship with God through Jesus Christ.
In the Garden of Eden, that relationship was destroyed, but Jesus’ death on the cross has restored that relationship.
There is no greater relationship for us than the one we have with the God who created us. Every other aspect of the Christian life has its source in this living and loving relationship we have with the God who created us and redeemed us.
A very close second to that relationship are our relationships with fellow Christians.
There has to be unity among us as husbands and wives, parents and children, and brothers and sisters in Christ.
The thing is though, as much as God wants unity in our lives, we know that it doesn’t always happen.
Interpersonal problems between Christians are a serious matter and these problems must be resolved. While all too often the relationships involved don’t seem very important to us, we forget that they are of utmost importance to God. We need to see that God wants us to surrender all of our lives to Him, including our relationships, even when it is uncomfortable and even when it goes against everything we believe and feel.
One of the greatest problems in interpersonal relationships is the tension which so often destroys those relationships.
This means that so many of our relationships remain unresolved. I’m not speaking about the petty little annoyances and habits that come our way from time to time, but rather those that can and do split friendships, families and Churches.
Proverbs 10:12 says, “Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offences.”
Not every little thing that rubs you up the wrong way needs to be brought up and hammered out. Some things need to be allowed to die as we learn in love to forgive and move along. But Jesus wasn’t talking about petty things which irritate in our reading today.
Rather, He is dealing with the case where a brother or sister knows there is a problem in a relationship that cannot be covered or forgotten, and in those situations, they need to be resolved and taken care of.
Unresolved problems sap the strength out of a relationship, out of any relationship. When problems go unresolved in a Church, they grow and hinder the Church’s effectiveness. They tear families apart and cause even more problems. There is therefore, no place for these things. They must be settled.
Jesus teaches that it’s not just wrong to murder someone, it’s wrong to hate. It’s not just wrong to commit adultery, it’s wrong to even consider it.
We who are called the children of God ought to have higher standards than those who are lost. We have to be more concerned about who we are and what we do and whom we represent.
Our righteousness must exceed the righteousness of the lost, and it’s a crying shame that there are lost people out there today who are living better lives than many of God’s children. God is holding us to a higher standard.
If Jesus is a priority in our lives, then sorting out our relationships with other Christians needs to be a priority, and we do this by following the Lord’s instructions.
Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s leading. In verse 23 Jesus says, “If you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you…”
What He is talking about here is how our worship can be hindered by holding grudges. If there is some kind tension between you and another believer, it’s not a coincidence that you feel uneasy about it - it’s the Holy Spirit trying to get your attention and trying to get you to do something about putting truth into action. The Holy Spirit says to us, “Stop right where you are and go make it right.”
Jesus says, “If your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”
David wrote in Psalm 51, “You will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”
What this means is that God is not nearly as interested in our worship as He is in our personal holiness. We can’t come to Him in worship while we know that something needs to be made right in our lives and we aren’t willing to do something about it. The Holy Spirit is going to bring it up; our responsibility is to respond in obedience to what He says.
Paul writes in Galatians 6:7-8, “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.”
How does that apply to the principle of reconciliation? It works like this: in every human relationship you are going to sow only one of two things – either things of the flesh or things of the Spirit.
If we know that we’ve offended our brother and we respond according to the leading of the Holy Spirit, then we will reap the fruit of the Spirit.
Jesus tells us to stop trying to worship and be religious and go to the one whom we’ve offended and be reconciled to that person.
If we will trust God and put aside our pride and ego, then we’ll gain our brother and things will work out for good. The relationship will be restored, and the love of God will shine through.
But, if we know that we’ve offended someone and we ignore the leading of the Holy Spirit, then we’ll reap the corruption of the flesh. This simply means that we get out what we put in.
What do we get out of failure to respond to the Holy Spirit when He says to be reconciled?
There are a number of things:
Firstly, our worship is not received. God is serious about Christians loving unconditionally.
Secondly, relationships can be destroyed. It doesn’t matter what relationship it is, if we know that we’ve wronged the other or they even think we have and we choose not to seek reconciliation, eventually we’ll lose any hope of being close to that person.
Any chance of unity will be lost. We see it all the time. This is one of the reasons why some marriages fail. This is why parents and children stop talking to one another. This is why Churches lose members, and it’s why we lose friends.
And thirdly, we will place ourselves in bondage. There is no bondage like that of broken relationships. When we are at odds with a family member or another Christian, it gets everyone involved as they also feel the tension. Others become caught up in the crossfire, and the only way to fix that is through reconciliation and forgiveness. It’s only then that peace can be made. It’s only then that people feel the freedom to open up and be one again.
There is a hardness that comes with refusing to obey the Lord, and the longer we refuse the harder we become. Bitterness and anger results.
Jesus tells us that the result of disobedience is bondage, and it is a bondage that is completely unnecessary, because all we have to do to escape that bondage is make right a wrong – to be reconciled with whoever it is that we’ve offended.
God wants us to enjoy the blessings of relationships that are characterised by unity and oneness.
And it starts with each of us. We need to learn to surrender our pride, anger, and fears and seek reconciliation.
As Christians we are not allowed to hold on to our own personal hurts and grievances; we lost the right to refuse to forgive at the foot of the Cross.
Jesus says it best in John 13: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
21 “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ 22 But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire. 23 So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. 25 Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are going with him to court, lest your accuser hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the guard, and you be put in prison.
The Christian faith is based on our relationship with God through Jesus Christ.
In the Garden of Eden, that relationship was destroyed, but Jesus’ death on the cross has restored that relationship.
There is no greater relationship for us than the one we have with the God who created us. Every other aspect of the Christian life has its source in this living and loving relationship we have with the God who created us and redeemed us.
A very close second to that relationship are our relationships with fellow Christians.
There has to be unity among us as husbands and wives, parents and children, and brothers and sisters in Christ.
The thing is though, as much as God wants unity in our lives, we know that it doesn’t always happen.
Interpersonal problems between Christians are a serious matter and these problems must be resolved. While all too often the relationships involved don’t seem very important to us, we forget that they are of utmost importance to God. We need to see that God wants us to surrender all of our lives to Him, including our relationships, even when it is uncomfortable and even when it goes against everything we believe and feel.
One of the greatest problems in interpersonal relationships is the tension which so often destroys those relationships.
This means that so many of our relationships remain unresolved. I’m not speaking about the petty little annoyances and habits that come our way from time to time, but rather those that can and do split friendships, families and Churches.
Proverbs 10:12 says, “Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offences.”
Not every little thing that rubs you up the wrong way needs to be brought up and hammered out. Some things need to be allowed to die as we learn in love to forgive and move along. But Jesus wasn’t talking about petty things which irritate in our reading today.
Rather, He is dealing with the case where a brother or sister knows there is a problem in a relationship that cannot be covered or forgotten, and in those situations, they need to be resolved and taken care of.
Unresolved problems sap the strength out of a relationship, out of any relationship. When problems go unresolved in a Church, they grow and hinder the Church’s effectiveness. They tear families apart and cause even more problems. There is therefore, no place for these things. They must be settled.
Jesus teaches that it’s not just wrong to murder someone, it’s wrong to hate. It’s not just wrong to commit adultery, it’s wrong to even consider it.
We who are called the children of God ought to have higher standards than those who are lost. We have to be more concerned about who we are and what we do and whom we represent.
Our righteousness must exceed the righteousness of the lost, and it’s a crying shame that there are lost people out there today who are living better lives than many of God’s children. God is holding us to a higher standard.
If Jesus is a priority in our lives, then sorting out our relationships with other Christians needs to be a priority, and we do this by following the Lord’s instructions.
Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s leading. In verse 23 Jesus says, “If you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you…”
What He is talking about here is how our worship can be hindered by holding grudges. If there is some kind tension between you and another believer, it’s not a coincidence that you feel uneasy about it - it’s the Holy Spirit trying to get your attention and trying to get you to do something about putting truth into action. The Holy Spirit says to us, “Stop right where you are and go make it right.”
Jesus says, “If your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”
David wrote in Psalm 51, “You will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”
What this means is that God is not nearly as interested in our worship as He is in our personal holiness. We can’t come to Him in worship while we know that something needs to be made right in our lives and we aren’t willing to do something about it. The Holy Spirit is going to bring it up; our responsibility is to respond in obedience to what He says.
Paul writes in Galatians 6:7-8, “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.”
How does that apply to the principle of reconciliation? It works like this: in every human relationship you are going to sow only one of two things – either things of the flesh or things of the Spirit.
If we know that we’ve offended our brother and we respond according to the leading of the Holy Spirit, then we will reap the fruit of the Spirit.
Jesus tells us to stop trying to worship and be religious and go to the one whom we’ve offended and be reconciled to that person.
If we will trust God and put aside our pride and ego, then we’ll gain our brother and things will work out for good. The relationship will be restored, and the love of God will shine through.
But, if we know that we’ve offended someone and we ignore the leading of the Holy Spirit, then we’ll reap the corruption of the flesh. This simply means that we get out what we put in.
What do we get out of failure to respond to the Holy Spirit when He says to be reconciled?
There are a number of things:
Firstly, our worship is not received. God is serious about Christians loving unconditionally.
Secondly, relationships can be destroyed. It doesn’t matter what relationship it is, if we know that we’ve wronged the other or they even think we have and we choose not to seek reconciliation, eventually we’ll lose any hope of being close to that person.
Any chance of unity will be lost. We see it all the time. This is one of the reasons why some marriages fail. This is why parents and children stop talking to one another. This is why Churches lose members, and it’s why we lose friends.
And thirdly, we will place ourselves in bondage. There is no bondage like that of broken relationships. When we are at odds with a family member or another Christian, it gets everyone involved as they also feel the tension. Others become caught up in the crossfire, and the only way to fix that is through reconciliation and forgiveness. It’s only then that peace can be made. It’s only then that people feel the freedom to open up and be one again.
There is a hardness that comes with refusing to obey the Lord, and the longer we refuse the harder we become. Bitterness and anger results.
Jesus tells us that the result of disobedience is bondage, and it is a bondage that is completely unnecessary, because all we have to do to escape that bondage is make right a wrong – to be reconciled with whoever it is that we’ve offended.
God wants us to enjoy the blessings of relationships that are characterised by unity and oneness.
And it starts with each of us. We need to learn to surrender our pride, anger, and fears and seek reconciliation.
As Christians we are not allowed to hold on to our own personal hurts and grievances; we lost the right to refuse to forgive at the foot of the Cross.
Jesus says it best in John 13: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”